The “Gift” of Service!

I’ve been teaching (preaching) SERVICE since 1979….that’s when I got my first “real” adult job with Joske’s of Houston. It was a department store chain…headquartered at the GALLERIA in Houston, Texas. Now, if you haven’t been to Houston, you’re missing out on something BIG. Yes, there’s Big Hair, Big Sports, Big Rodeo, Big Airports, Big Houses, Big Traffic, Big Everything….But, the one thing I learned about and kept with me all these years is the ARt of Service! Joske’s always had BIG SERVICE. We threw “over the top” customer parties, (Urban Cowboy style), champagne fashion shows, specials for our private label credit card customers, exclusive viewings of our latest lines, high tea at 3:00 p.m. with a violin player or pianist or both! Wow, we pampered our customers…we knew them by “first” name….we knew everything about them, thanks to our clientele books…and we took excellent care of their every need. They loved it, we loved catering to them…they became family…and instead of going to work…I would go to my position every day….wondering what wild, crazy, and remarkable things I would encounter and get to do for that day. Yes, I said “get to do”…not “have to do”, there’s a difference.

I had a good teacher, a great teacher, she was, as they say, my mentor. I thought the sun and moon set on her every word, and rightfully so, she was the expert, the epitome of service. You know how when you’re talking to someone, the ones that are really listening and hanging onto your every word, versus the ones that are just looking at you, but their minds are on something else, not necessarily on what you’re saying and trying to convey? We’ll my mentor taught me well. She taught me that SERVICE is an ARt! Everyone can deliver great service, regardless of their circumstances, but not everyone does. So, that’s what makes you Remark – able….Indispensable. Delivering service is an art that involves a couple of critical elements…one being listening and being in the present with your customer.

Another element of “great service” starts with leadership and culture. The Leaders and the leadership of the company, have to embrace service…I’m not talking the flavor of the month or balloons and clowns kind of service…however, that’s fun and once in awhile it’s a nice touch to any service campaign or store opening…but, Service has to be ingrained in the company culture….it has to be the focus….and everyone that is recruited, that is part of the company organization has to have SERVICE running through their blood. Every decision that is made, has to be made with SERVICE in mind. People who deliver great “remarkable” service, consistently, genuinely love to serve others…to give their gifts, to deliver their art. They do it because they don’t know any other way. Their outlook is mostly “sunny” with a few clouds. They want to make people smile…they love life, and want to be seen as “adding” to another’s life in a positive way and are not afraid to ship, even if it’s not perfect….they ship their ARt….they are proud to share their gift of service and they do it…without hesitation.

First and foremost service has to be delivered ( shipped) internally. You can’t deliver great service to your external customer without first getting and giving GREAT service internally. (You can, but it’s much more painful). Yet, how many companies have you worked for or worked with where most of the associates are rude to each other, don’t know each other , are set up to compete with each other…for funds, etc., or just plain don’t care about each other’s needs? This attitude spells disaster. We don’t have room for these types of company’s anymore. Customers can see right through this, with complications, screw-ups, or just a maze of red-tape when trying to get something done. Customers will not put up with a poorly run….serviced, company and they don’t have to. Customers today can go anywhere to fulfill their needs, and they will….they will only be loyal to a company that they feel is delivering (shipping) great service internally…and it’s demonstrated EXTERNALLY.

Internal Service is not hard to accomplish, but it is ignored by a great many companies. It’s almost as if we think it’s OK to treat each other poorly since we’re in the same company. Similar to how we sometimes treat our loved ones…sometimes they see and get the worst of us…because they know we’ll forgive them. Don’t fall prey to this. Everyone deserves respect…and even more so, every employee arrives wanting to do a good job, to fit in, to be a part, to be included…to be appreciated for the gift of service they give to one another.

What powers great service, above training, communication, interpersonal skills, employee handbook, policies, etc. is ATTITUDE. Everyone is always asking me about how to create a great attitude in people. You can’t create attitude…but, you can demonstrate, encourage, model, and reward great attitude. People know right from wrong, generally. It’s a choice they make every day, whether to have a great attitude or a poor one. I can always find plenty of things to complain about, to be disappointed about, to be critical about…but, I will choose to wake up every morning….thankful for the smallest things. Thankful for a nice hot cup of coffee, for my 2 dogs licking me, for the paper being delivered in my driveway vs. in my bushes, for the sun shining, for my roses blooming and smelling like sweet perfume, and for my husband, still lying in bed…sound asleep with a sweet smile on his face…probably having an amazing dream!

See, that’s what I’m talkin’ about….attitude is made up of the small stuff, the insignificant stuff that we may take for granted everyday…but, if we didn’t have it…how miserable would we be. Attitude is a choice of “how” we want to react to the day’s problems, the day’s issues, the up’s and down’s we will likely experience in this thing called “living”.

When we get our internal customer service “attitudes” in check, then we can focus on the “fun” stuff…the External Customer. This is where we can truly start to shine…because everyone in the company has our BACK. It’s amazing how innovative, creative, and REMARKABLE we can be when we know someone has our BACK.

External Service…what the customer can see, will always be dependent on how we view and treat each other (internally). External Service is what we ship to our customers everyday in the hopes that they will see, experience, and acknowledge our efforts to provide them with Remark-able service and products. We’ve all experienced lackluster, dull, boring, you’re interrupting me, type service. It truly is a disgrace, and yet we do put up with it….but, as we’re leaving, how many of us just start to feel sorry for them, sorry for their state of being, sorry for the company, etc. Yet, if we had an alternative to this store, this product/service, how many of us would go, or have gone to their competitors…in hopes of a different experience? I have. Yet, how many more of us, just put up with it…we’ve become immune to it…and we don’t realize how “poor” the service is…we’ve gotten used to it. BUT, if someone came along and offered us REMARK – able….amazing service…wouldn’t that be something to talk about?

Next time you’re in a store…shopping, picking up something, browsing….notice the service. Do they approach you with a smile, their name, and an offer to help? Do they let you know where you can find them? Do they allow you to meander without hovering? Do they attempt to start a short conversation…and see where it leads? Do they process your account with accuracy, and efficiency? Do they make sure they know how to contact you for additional services, discounts, newsletters, offerings? Do they care about your experience and ask you how your experience was? Do they “recover” well from a setback, or a problem? Do they ask for your feedback, and listen to your every word? Do you FEEL like you would like to come back and have them service you again? Do they follow-up with you after your encounter and ask how everything is?

My Veterinarian does…after every doctor/office visit I get a phone call or an email…making sure my Sparky or Wally is doing well. Heck, even my car company calls me after my service…to see how it went…and ask me to complete a short survey. Yes, it can be tedious, but, at least, they are trying.

I’m tired of getting HO-HUM service….I want employees to love their customers again….to engage us, to entertain us…to communicate effectively with us. I don’t want to feel like I’m interrupting, or being a pain in the neck….So, I guess I’ll continue to try to find the companies with employees that “get to do” great things, and give them my business and the rest…well, the rest will just become a statistic never realizing their potential and the joy of giving the “GIFT” they never gave.

Building a Winning Team

I’ve been coaching and facilitating “business” teams for the past 25 years. Yes, I started when I was 12. Anyway, the point is I’ve seen a lot, experienced a lot, and I’ve been involved in a lot of great success stories, where the “group” started from point zero in teamwork, knowledge, and skill….and became an amazing, remark- able synergistic team!

So, why do some teams Win, and Win consistently, and some teams fail, and fail a lot? After watching the Suns Series these past few weeks….first with the Spurs and then just recently with the Lakers, I realized that this had to be said. “A team can have the same circumstances, same resources, same Coach, same timelines, same customer, etc. but the one BIG variable are its players… what they believe, how they think of themselves and their teammates, their attitude toward the project/work, their values, their ability to engage with others in an effective way, to play different roles when needed, to observe what needs to happen and how they can assist, and their degree of confidence in themselves and the team.”

Many times good teams, great teams fail because of the Confidence Factor. They lose confidence. They think they may fail, they think they may not be good enough, and when they start to think these “lack of confidence” thoughts….Thoughts turn into things. Our actions follow our thoughts (brains) and pretty soon we’ve got the self-fulfilling prophecy.

The Suns were a talented group of players….I saw a lot of heart out there…I won’t name names, but you know when you see heart. Heart is passionate expression of the body and soul. Expressing how much you care and how much you want and desire a positive end result through your body language. Heck, just watching the last 8 minutes of the Suns game against the Lakers was like watching a completely different team! You know you’re playing with heart when you start fouling more, assisting more, rebounding more, and yes, making some “unbelievable” shots. There’s no “star” player, every member on the team shines, they each contribute something REMARK – able. The crowd goes wild, the players themselves even look different, you can see the change in their faces, their eyes, their muscle tone. They actually look like a TEAM!

But, being a part of a Winning Team first means you have to BELIEVE you’re part of a Winning Team. Confidence is a wacky sensation. I know we’ve all been there, on top of the world, feeling like we could accomplish anything…we had the golden touch, people loved us, our bosses constantly asked us our opinions, our customers called us, our family and friends Ooh’d and Ahh’d about us….then one day it happens…We’ve lost it! We feel stupid, we feel awkward, we start to doubt ourselves, we start to second guess our decisions, we start to make mistakes…thet we would never have made before we lost our Confidence. Just look at the last few years with the unemployed population. You think they’ve lost their confidence????

This is the same for teams. This is when the Coach has to “catch” the team….but, the Coach has to catch the team long before they start to lose confidence in themselves….Once the snow ball starts rolling down the hill…you can’t stop it…it’s self-fulfilling, it becomes a BIG snowball, full of speed and power.

So, what does a Winning Team, all Winning Teams have in common?

First, each player on the team has to want to be on the team. Each person has to want to be part of something BIGGER than themselves. Each person brings a unique skill, ability they can contribute to the teams overall success. I know in sports…we do think of key players as being the “star”…that’s okay, they may appear to be the star….but, to be an effective team, suppression of the EGO, humility, and knowing that you can’t WIN by yourself, it will and does take TEAM EFFORT is the guiding force.

Next, there has to be a COMMON “attainable” GOAL that each player buys into. Each player must commit to attaining the Goal of the Team AND be willing and able to do what it takes to accomplish the Goal. This means, that each player, regardless of the Role they were hired to play for the Team, must be willing to fill a void, jump in where needed, and play a different role. Roles can be functional, behavioral (task/process), or administrative.

Leadership is critical. Most teams have a formal leader/coach. We used to call these people supervisors, foreman, boss, manager, etc. Today, we like the term Team Leader, Team Coach, Team Facilitator. BUT, leadership on teams is shared. The Coach is the Coach…and we’ll get to this role in a moment, but, Leadership has to be everyone’s job. Leadership is the act of leading other’s based on your knowledge, expertise, skill, and trustworthiness. Your teammates must TRUST in your ability to lead, otherwise they won’t follow. Everyone on your team can lead, and should lead when the time and opportunity presents itself….otherwise, why are you on a team? (You might as well be part of a “group” of people, if you don’t want to show leadership when needed.) When you sense a leadership void…for whatever reason, step in and fill it! Show strength, show determination, and others will follow your lead and do the same.

Effective, Frequent Communication between all team members is a must. You don’t necessarily have to love each other, but you do need to respect each other and it really helps if you like each other. The “BEST” teams I’ve experienced all liked to laugh, and have fun together. They truly believed in the power of diversity, (heterogeneous vs. homogeneous)….but, this was a plus, because each person on the team was seen by the others as a Resource to the Team and differences were encouraged not put down. They could each put their own spin, their own 2 cents in on the matter and quickly they would be able to arrive at a great solution, a creative solution to a problem or issue the team was having. But, they had to be willing to listen, respect, and communicate with the goal of UNDERSTANDING. Then, and only then, did the team truly see themselves as synergistic…where the team could and would outperform any one best member on it!

If there is a Formal Team Leader…and I will let you know now that Self-directed Work Teams….all have team leads, team facilitators, and process consultants…but, the team roles are more accomplished and extensive. But, for now, let me just say that the COACH or TEAM LEAD Role for the Winning TEAM is all about empowerment. It’s all about moving the team through the stages of GROWTH and knowing when to pull back and when to lead based on the teams readiness. The skills, and attitude of a Coach/Team Leader are different than the traditional supervisor/boss. There is more participation, more active involvement, more consensus, more trust in team members. But, it’s the ROLE they play for the team, and it’s a critical role that can greatly influence the teams confidence, readiness for more responsibility, and ultimate interdependency.

Being part of a Winning Team feels great. Does this mean that if you’re an effective, synergistic, team you’ll always win?…of course not. There will be days when you won’t, something will happen, mistakes will be made, but the difference in being a part of a Winning Team is in their ability to pick themselves up, dust themselves off and stay in the GAME….

Winning TEAMs ultimately WIN because they BELIEVE they CAN, and they’ve got the confidence to prove it!

Ugly Ducklings into Swans

I am a coach, trainer, and facilitator at heart. I’m also an optimist…and love to encourage “change” and improvement in people for the better. For their betterment, for the world’s betterment. In the past year or so I’ve been noticing an interesting “social” dynamic between the different generations
( Millennial, GenY, GenX, Boomers, Traditionalist). We all have things in common and sometimes even talk the same language…although I’m still trying to learn Twitter Speak. But, technology advances seem to have become both “the good news” and “the bad news”. Here’s why. For those who were raised on computers…there is no fear, no caution, no apprehension to try new applications, etc. You were conditioned to explore, ask questions, try things out, and yes, even fail. You were encouraged to take chances, take a risk, and the worst that could happen…wouldn’t necessarily be that bad. But for those who were raised on an calculator/slide rule or something similar, there’s a great deal of fear, of timidness, of exhaustion, of being overwhelmed with all the terms and technology. This generation was taught to do it right the first time, don’t make mistakes, and don’t look stupid. Wow, what a difference in how we were treated and the expectations that were placed on us. I’ve also noticed that more and more we seem to be talking about “reverse mentoring”. At first, when I heard the term, I thought, great….this will really help the job seekers that are not as proficient in technology…or perhaps they’ve never attempted to use Social Media….but, what I’ve witnessed is far from the goal of bridging the technology gap between generations. Don’t get me wrong, I do believe there are people out there that truly desire to help, mentor, coach, etc. but, for the most part I’m seeing a widening split…a chasm of sorts between the generations which concerns me.

I know that when you’re growing up in Junior High, High School, College, you think your parents are old, they aren’t with it, or up with the times….at least I did for awhile….Then, it starts to turn…about half way through college, they become GREAT, where have they been? …They’re actually fun, you go out together, and pretty soon, you start to treat them like friends…even though they make it very clear that they are still your parents, and they will have the final word. But, my point is that this change of acceptance, of treating each other as equals, of respect, came over me, after I realized just how lucky I was. They no longer were trying to sabotage me, or be “mean” to me….they were trying to guide, direct, and shape me into a functional human being, that could and would contribute great things to our community.

So, what does this have to do with reverse mentoring? Here’s what I know, remember Eliza Doolittle…My Fair Lady? She was a mere country flower girl, an ugly duckling of sorts, that was transformed into an heiress….a real Swan. What was the key in her transformation? Sure, she was tutored a bit, changed her clothes, and her accent was controlled…but, how she was treated and the belief of Henry Higgins was the critical element. How he treated her and the belief that he had that she could change and he could pass her off as an heiress was the tipping point. (Yes, he did have a bet going on with his friend…but, that’s not the point). This belief and how she was treated led to her transformation. This belief instilled confidence in her. She believed that she could change, could learn, could become whatever she wanted to become. I know this was a movie…but, I think we can learn a great deal from the Pygmalion Effect and apply it to our generational splits and how we can “learn” from each other.

I’m all for people of like minds, and skills, getting together to share their talents, etc. But, I’m also for mixing it up a bit, and letting diversity happen. Reverse mentoring is about teaching each other what we know. It allows us to learn from both the younger generation and the older generation….but, we’ve got to set the conditions for this to happen…and start creating venues for mixing it up.

I was at a brown bag meeting the other day with my husband. The speaker was interesting…however, I noticed a few things: Everyone there had their laptops open and were working during the presentation. The speaker, although interesting, was difficult to hear…so, those at the back of the room seemed restless and their attention span started to wane. The ability to mix and mingle with each other was difficult, since the tables were not set for this interaction, and people were not encouraged to share their stories. Wow, did we miss out on meeting some talented people…just because it wasn’t seen as an opportunity to explore each others gifts.

We all come with gifts to give. Don’t count the older generation out. This is the generation that never wanted to grow old. They want to learn, to educate themselves, to fit in….heck they are always dying their hair, buying the latest cars, keeping plastic surgeons in business, and trying desperately to stay fit! What they need is “BELIEF” in their ability to learn this new technology. Sure, they are a little fearful, it’s new stuff….they were raised on the IBM punch card for God’s sake!…But, with a little bit of Pygmalion, belief from the younger generation, who were raised on Apple Computers, ….I know we can bridge the chasm, the split.

What will it take? Let’s start with respect and how we treat each other. Each one of us, regardless of which generation we came from can share our knowledge, skills, experiences, and talents. We need to show respect for each others gifts, and encourage one another to participate, to feel comfortable in sharing. The older generation…anyone over 40 can still teach the younger generation a few things. Their experience with effective communication, teamwork, salesmanship, and presenting ideas so others want to listen, and are moved to act is a start. And for the younger generation, we need you to teach us how to navigate in this new world of technology.

What I’d like to see is more Collaboration between generations, more tit for tat, more opportunities to share each others knowledge and learn from each other without feeling uncomfortable, or stupid. You see, fear always gets in the way, fear raises its ugly head and stops us from moving forward, from reaching out, from becoming Mentors. Fear puts up the walls, and makes us think that “we vs. they” is the norm…so, don’t fight it. I disagree, I think “us” is the way to go….US means all of us. Let’s apply the Pygmalion Effect , let’s start turning Ugly Ducklings into Swans, and believe that each of us has the potential, ability, and will to change, to learn new skills, to create a better community, and to enjoy each other s ARt! Come on people…let’s get together!!! Remember…how we’re treated makes a BIG difference.

Too Big to Care

You’ve heard the term “too big to fail”…well, I’d like to suggest we might be getting too big to care.

About a year or so ago, my husband, Al, and I swore off watching the news, cable news, the newspapers, etc. because everything we saw, heard, read was negative. Well, that lasted about 12 hours…then, the TV goes back on, the paper gets delivered and we don’t have the strength not read or listen. But, I think it was more than just not enough willpower to stay away from the stuff…because it might change our mood…I think it was because we did care…we just became frustrated over the fact that we “felt” we couldn’t do anything, we couldn’t change the negative news, we had no control over most of it. We really thought the world had become too big for us to make a difference.

At least that’s what we thought. But, I’ve been reflecting on this thought. Growing up in the 50′s in a small town in Illinois…very small town…didn’t even have a stop light, people really cared about each other, and each others needs. Yes, it was a little like Peyton Place, too, but, overall it was a great place to raise kids, start a business, attend community events…and celebrate the holidays. We had the Big Park in our little downtown…that always hosted the local 4th of July Celebration and everyone came out all 3 nights to meet with their neighbors, drink some beer, and play a little Bingo. It really was a Norman Rockwell Painting. We used to have Front porches, so we could wave to each other on those warm summer evenings and find out the latest gossip. I used to cut my neighbor’s yard…she was an older woman and her kids lived out of town…so, I’d sit with her on her front porch swing….talk about stuff that a 10 year old girl would talk about and cut her yard with my Dad’s push mower every week. I don’t know why I did it…I wasn’t paid for it…didn’t even ask for any pay…I just knew she needed her grass cut, and I had the time to do it. I actually enjoyed doing it….I guess it was the satisfaction of accomplishing a task and standing back to look at my masterpiece…Of course, she would smile, and say thank you, and we’d sit and talk and drink lemonade before I’d say goodnight and cross the yard to my front door.

There are days when I look at our lives, our businesses, our economy, our politicians, our leaders, our industries and I just wonder, what happened? The 50′s are gone, but do we have to lose the FEELING of the 50′s? I’m all for progress, innovation, change, and making a good living….as long as we think about the consequences of our forward movement. Lately, I think we’ve lost our moral compass, we’ve been growing, progressing, innovating, and creating huge industries, huge corporations without the necessary follow- through, the required for-thought, the long term vision of why we are doing what we are doing. We seem to have lost our human element. We seem to have misplaced our WHY. What happened to caring about the outcome and the consequences of our behavior?

Just listening to the news in the past month has cause for alarm. Sure, we’ve got the mortgage crisis, the financial crisis, the European Market crisis, the potential China bubble, and now we’ve got the Gulf Oil crisis…with BP in the center. Are we becoming too big to care? Are we willing to sit and watch the news every day, or listen to the latest radio commentary and just let it go in one ear and out the other? I hope not. Every crisis this country , this world, is experiencing…affects a person, a family, a community. And yet, it seems as if we as a nation have become hardened by all of them, as if, it’s someone’s else’s problem, it doesn’t apply to us, it’s water cooler talk, or twitter feed.

Have we become too big to care? I’d like to propose that we use our technology, our Social Media tools for a cause. I’d like to bring the human element back in style…50′s style. I’d like to ask for our leaders to lead, not hide behind their politics, or point fingers at each other. That’s not leadership, that’s not showing Courage in the heat of the battle, that’s just pure cowardness. You see it’s easy to pass the buck, to not take responsibility, to not stand-up for what you believe in, to not be accountable for your decisions and the consequences of them. It’s easy to be a coward, to hide, to point fingers, to talk about the other guy, to blame others for your failures, to feel sorry for yourself, to show a true lack of integrity.

On the other hand, it’s hard to be a leader. It takes more than work. It takes the desire, the will, the emotional labor to want to change and leave the world a better place for your efforts.

Yes, I’m an optimist because I do think we can take back our moral compass. I believe we can recapture the human element of CARING about others, their businesses, their livelihoods, their families, their communities. BUT, we have to use our abilities, our talents, our skills, in a productive way. We have to let our voices be heard. We have to take back our society and start to plant seeds that will grow strong leaders, stewards of our resources, communities that care for one another, just because it’s the right thing to do…not because it’s pays something, or we expect reciprocity from it….but, just because we are the human race and we’ve been given this glorious planet to share with one another.

I shudder to think that the BP’s of the world, with all their clout, their technical expertise, their fancy offices, their multi-billion dollar executives can’t LEAD and take accountability for the horrific consequence they’ve created by not perfecting a back-up plan for the what -if. But, do we all have to sit in front of our TV’s for another month and pontificate about it….I think not. I think it’s time to Lead. To let our voices be heard, to start electing politicians that know how to LEAD and not just double speak.

This goes for all of us. From President Obama down to the president of the PTA….and everyone in between. If we decide that we’re not going to be too big to Care…then the opposite must be true. We will start looking at each other differently, we’ll start asking what we can do to make a difference in someone else’s life, we’ll start respecting each others differences and embracing them, we’ll start protecting our precious resources and becoming stewards of our Earth. We can beat this thing called too big to care…we just have to care enough to push through the resistance and make it happen.

What’s Your Brand?

I’ve been interested in what different author’s, experts, and human resource professionals have been advising the  unemployed, or underemployed for the past year and half. You see, before I started my own coaching and consulting firm, I used to be a “factory” worker for a large retail conglomerate. Don’t get the wrong idea, when I say “factory” worker, I just mean I used to work for someone else, for their Brand, and make them lots of money. But, hey, that job, my boss, gave me lots of rope, lots of responsibility, and with it the ability to become indispensable,… to become a linchpin. Of course, I had to earn the right, prove I could handle the larger responsibilities, but soon, there it was, the opening to be the Director of it all… Recruitment, Employment, Human Resource Development, New Hire Training, Credit Marketing, College Relations, etc. etc. You might ask, why the heck did I quit…why did I give up this great position, lots of responsibility, interesting work, my own covered parking space, the corner office, the keys to the building, decent income, expense account, and an Executive Discount??? I had to, for me. I had to find “My Why”, the stuff that mattered to me, and create “My Brand”.

It was safe, and safe is okay for some people, but not for me. I had too much I wanted to do, stuff I wanted to try, to test, to explore. I never once thought I would fail….that word wasn’t in my vocabulary. Oh sure, I knew there would be days where I’d make a mistake, maybe more mistakes than I’d like to admit….but, that was the learning process. And believe you me, I learned a lot from those mistakes. Making them, actually built my confidence….go figure.

I loved learning, and still do! I love the process of asking questions, discovering new roads, exploring a problem, and working with a team of people just as excited and committed as I am to create and innovate. That’s why I traveled the US and Canada, that’s why I collaborated with an amazing experiential learning company out of Guelph, Ontario. That’s why I developed amazing relationships with some of the world’s Best facilitators and leaders. Because I wanted to understand, I wanted to know what made them tick, I wanted to glean from them, learn from them, and hopefully, in the process, we would all be better for it.

So what does this have to do with YOUR Brand? Brands, in general, create comfort, and people love to feel comfortable. With a Brand Product you know what to expect, what you will receive, it’s trustworthy, it’s predictable. People love predictability…especially if they are contemplating a new hire decision. They don’t want to make a mistake…for a lot of reasons. Well, from my own experience with Job Seekers, and the underemployed I have a huge tip: If you want to nail a job, or keep your own, you’ve got to learn “how” to become indispensable and develop YOUR Brand. I’m not talking about helping everyone, and becoming Mr. or Ms. Mom for the office…I’m talking about being the “Go- to” person, the glue for the project, the connector, the relationship person, the leader, the organizer, the finisher, the one that sees possibilities, creates ARt and gives it away.

If you become indispensable for your organization, you won’t have to worry about your position, chances are, you’ll be promoted! But, if you’re out there with thousands of other Job Seekers, you’ve got to stand out, you’ve got to show your greatness, your talents, your remarkableness.

Google yourself. If what you are reading about yourself is not : captivating, exciting, interesting, and shows off your amazing skills, talents, and ARt….then change it! Yes, I said change it! It’s time to start paying attention to WHO you are, not just what you are.

Prospective employers will use the internet to check you out. They’ll go on-line to look at your LinkedIn Profile, your Facebook page and maybe a few other sites. But, what will they find, what will they read about you, what will their perception be? Will you be there, will you pop up on Google? If not, you’ve got a little work to do, but it’s not impossible work…it’s very doable work, but you’ve got to have the WILL, the desire to do it! If you care about landing the next big job, the one that offers you lots of responsibility, interesting work, and nice pay…you know the one where your boss gives you the room to grow, become indispensable….then, you’ve got to put in the emotional labor, the time, to BRAND yourself.

A couple of thoughts to think about:
• Does your LinkedIn account start with WHY? If you’re not communicating your purpose, up front, people won’t know what you stand for, what you believe, what you care deeply about. Express your why….then explain what you do, and be sure it adds value. Don’t just state your previous positions…explain how you helped, explain why you were indispensable. Give your gifts. Respond to questions in your area of expertise, start a LinkedIn group that you manage, or join multiple groups where you can be proactive…start a discussion, or respond/answer a question. Let potential employers know how valuable your “gifts” are. Every person you come in contact with via Social Media is a potential employer, or a person who may know a potential employer that “needs” you!
• What does your Facebook page say about you? Be careful what you post, pictures, activities, etc. Potential employers scour these pages as well to get a read on what you enjoy doing, who you hang with, etc.
• Do you have a Blog? If you can email someone, you can Blog. Follow Denise Wakeman’s “4 E’s”…when blogging: Educate, Enrich, Engage, and Entertain. Use pictures if appropriate or put a short video on your Blog to enhance your point of view. You’d be surprised at how many people will start to follow you if your content is consistent, helpful, and current.
• Let’s talk Resume’...Please “update” it. Please “engage” me. Please tell me how you were “indispensable” to your employers. Please don’t bore me with verbiage that doesn’t say anything. Please give me your Unique Selling Proposition up front. Please Summarize your accomplishments/achievements.

• If you are looking for work…but, have some free time on your hands…VOLUNTEER. I know that most people think networking is the key. It’s okay to network… In fact we started the original PinkedIn Parties for Phoenix in 2009…but, the point is, you want to start BRANDING yourself. By volunteering, you keep your skills and talents tuned, you continue to build confidence, but, you also accomplish much more… You start to turn your skills into ARt and you start to GIVE your ARt away. Blog about it….but, be careful not to get too full of yourself…no one likes a braggart…so check your EGO at the door.

The point to all this is that without a BRAND, potential employers, where you’d be a perfect fit, might never get to meet you. The internet has become one of the BEST ways for employers to look you up, check you out, before they contact you for an interview. Even the best Recruiters out there, are doing the same thing. Social Media is not a FAD. If you’re not on the BUS, find someone that is. A little reverse mentoring can go a long way. It’s your choice. Learn to become indispensable, be a linchpin, and create a glorious Brand for yourself….or, just join another factory and play it safe. You choose… You decide…. It’s your Life…. Make it Remarkable!

Why starts with YOU.

I’m sitting here today on a glorious Arizona Sunday. I’ve just finished Simon Sinek’s book “Start With Why” for the second time…I’m a slow learner, and of course it’s now full of margin notes, green, yellow, and orange highlighter…and dog-eared pages. As I reflect on his work of ART…and yes, I do consider his book ART, it’s his gift, his talent that he has chosen to share with us, I’m struck by my own predicament, what’s my WHY?

People, just like organizations, can split from their Why and yes, get fuzzy. Has that happened to me? I do believe that when we are growing up, we change our minds, many times, when asked…”What do you want to be when you grow up?” I would always base my answer on what I thought I was good at, excelled at, or just out right liked to do? I never thought about my WHY, my purpose, my reason for being, my values and beliefs. But, as we move from grade school, to high school, and some of us onto college and higher education….we start to evolve. We start to learn about the world, it’s people, it’s politics, and we start to decide for ourselves what our Cause is, what our Beliefs are, and just How we want to Make a Difference.

Sometimes, just watching a commercial about the AZ Humane Society can make me cry, and ache for the animals on the screen. I have a compelling need to help. Someday, I’ll make the commitment, I’ll embellish my cause, my crusade for the animals. It’s not just animals, however. I’m like this whenever I see a need, a suffering, a wrong, an abuse.

It’s my belief that most of us out there are like this. We may have a push-pull going on inside us. We have passions, and causes, and hopes, and dreams….but, in our real world, we have work. Maybe we all think that someday, we’ll be able to live out our true selves, our true beliefs, and for the time being we just have to get by, make some money, pay the bills, and later…much later, when we have time, we’ll return to our purpose, our passion, our WHY. Hummmm…somehow, this just doesn’t feel right.

I’ll always remember one of the most famous conversations in The Graduate….when Dustin Hoffman…fresh out of law school starts to talk with Elaine’s Dad…He recommends an industry for Dustin to get involved in …Plastics…that’s the Future, he says. I noticed the look on Dustin’s face….it screams, get me out of here, thanks for the tip, but no thanks, I’m not going to be a cog in the wheel…and join the factory. But, that was the 60′s. It was the generation of change, rebellion, crusading for causes, for revolutionizing the way things were done, and for thinking WHAT’S Possible?

Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak of Apple Computer came out of this generation, although it may have been a few years after the Flower Power 60′s. They had a WHY…they had a crystal clear WHY…that except for a small blip, Apple Computer, it’s employees and its’ customers, all knew the WHY behind the Company. They embraced and bought the WHAT, because it was consistent with the WHY. Their customer’s could Trust their What because it aligned with their How and their Why. The WHY of Apple Computer is clear: To empower the dreamers and the idealists to challenge the status quo and succeed. Every product they’ve ever designed, has done just this. They know their customer’s and their customer’s love them for it. They are not the biggest technology company in the world, most people don’t want to challenge the status quo, but for the millions who do…Apple is the company that champions the creative spirit of the individual, and their products and services prove it.

But, the key is….Apple Computer’s WHY started long before Apple was born. It started with 2 men working out of Wozniak’s dorm room in 1971.

Apple will continue to challenge us with products that follow the early patterns of the Macintosh, the iPhone, and now the iPad, and we can’t wait to see what will come from them next! Apple’s success and ability has very little to do with industry expertise…many companies have talent, resources, and just as great of quality products. Apple’s success comes from a purpose, cause and belief that started many years ago with a couple of kids from California.

They never lost their WHY….and everything they did, how they structured the company, how they treated their employees, their customers, the experience they gave everyone was in alignment with their WHY….So, it follows that their WHAT, their products, should also be in alignment with their WHY…this is what makes Apple Computer so Authentic…and trusted. You believe, and you trust, because of their consistency of delivering their WHAT, based on their WHY. There is no FUZZY.

To create your why…you MUST look behind. You must look back. Even though it may be difficult. But, for me, right now, that’s what I need to do. To look back, at what I was, what I’ve become, and who I know I can be in the future. For me, it’s a little scary. I’ve always associated myself with someone else’s WHY. Even though I’ve been an Independent contractor, and have started LLC’s, etc. My Brand has been their Brand. Now, for the first time, in forever, we have an opportunity to tell people, customers, anyone that will listen, our WHY. We’ve got to use our Megaphone. We’ve got to be clear why we believe what we believe, what our purpose is for creating our little training and coaching company, and why we want to share it with you, the Innovator’s, the Early Adoptor’s, the left hand side of Moore’s Curve. You will be the ones to listen, to remark, to sneeze our why, to hear our clear “megaphone” voice. It’s scary, and exciting. What if I get it wrong? What if no one will want to buy my WHY? You know people don’t buy what you do, they buy why you do it.

I’ve got to stop second guessing myself. I’ve got to look myself straight in the eyes and ASK….just what are you scared of? Success? No, I’m not scared of success, I’m scared of failing. I read all the books, and I know “rationally” that failing is the only way we learn and grow…but, in the past, I’ve always been the one to succeed, to win, I’ve never really “failed” at something…until now. The past few months have been one failure after another. Maybe, I shouldn’t call them failures….but, they sure did feel like failures. Oh, we’ve learned a lot, we’ve created some amazing “what’s”….we’ve developed very sophisticated “how’s”. But you know what’s been missing? An undeniable, crystal clear WHY. People will ask me, what’s your motivation, your drive, your pull that enables you to get out of bed every morning and TRY to make a difference? WHY do you insist on trying to change the world, one company at a time? WHY do you want to learn all you can learn just to pass it on and share it with someone else? WHY is it so gratifying for you to see others excel, and reach for the stars, and you’re okay with knowing you had a small part in their success? The answer to all these questions, is because that’s what I was put on this beautiful earth for…I know my WHY…my WHY is to be there to support, to encourage, to catch you when you fall, to coach, to entertain, to challenge, to educate, and to revel in your success. For you see, your success becomes my success. My WHY, My How, My What are in balance with each other….there will be no FUZZINESS…no Split from My WHY. The company we are building has a STRONG WHY, a clear why….it will pass the Celery Test. It starts with ME. Thank you Simon Sinek…I’ve found my WHY.

What’s Your Gift?

Now that’s a great question?….It’s a real thought-provoking question, yet, I know we’ve all had people tell us from time to time, what great cooks we are, what great speakers we are, how great we are at interior decorating…or maybe they’ve said, “you’re so talented…I could never do that”, or “wow, you really hit the ball well….what a natural talent!” But, are the things that we’re good at or excel at, are they are gifts?

Maybe they are, but I’d like explore this “gift” thing a little deeper with you, so bear with me.

For the past few weeks, I’ve been reading Seth Godin’s latest book, Linchpin…you might have guessed this from my past few blogs….His question on the front of the book is “Are you Indispensable?”….of course, we’d like to think of ourselves as indispensable…but, as I got into the book…he mentions that the people that are truly indispensable are the ones that: practice their art, are crazy about their art, have drawn their own map to do their art,….and are now giving this gift, their art!

….Of course some have been able to monetize their art and have made a living out of it…but, the fact remains…they have become indispensable….they are unique, they are great at what they do, they put every ounce of emotional labor into what they do…and they give it away, freely.

The mere fact that they are not thinking every waking moment about making money doing their art is key. They truly want to create art and give their gift! And yet, these are the very people that are generous, fulfilled, happy, living life to its’ fullest. They are attracting the “right” people/customers to them, and yes, they seem to be doing just fine…and they can still pay the bills. You’ve seen these people, you’ve come into contact with them…on a daily basis, I hope. They are not the CEOs in the ivory towers….of course they could be, it they chose to be indispensable, but 9 times out of 10….these people are the ones that inspire us, make us laugh with joy, are able to make you, the customer, feel like you’re the most important person in their lives right now…in that instant! They are the people that value relationships, that value connection, that have an indescribable “brilliance” about them. They might be the bag boy at the grocery store, the waiter at your favorite restaurant, the landscaper that works alongside his crew, the teacher that buys supplies out of her own pocket because she wants her students to be able to create art too, the nurse who puts a little extra human attention and care into her job because she understands how miserable it is to be sick and away from home.

They all are doing Art. So, what is art?…Art is a skill that is uniquely yours and that skill becomes art the minute, the second, you stop thinking about how to do it…it becomes natural to you, it’s your identity, it’s your stamp on society.(Think about great golfers, great pianist, great painters, great chefs, great writers). When you don’t even have to think about it…it just happens, you’ve become your “art” and your “art” has become you. Everyone can be an artist, because everyone has the potential to turn a unique skill of theirs into Art…but you’ve got to want it. You’ve got to have the will, the discipline, the motivation, and the ability to shut off that lizard brain of yours and go for it!

These people are finding the parts of their job that they love….and they are creating art. It’s unique to them, it’s not something that can be replicated, or commoditized….it’s their undeniable gift they are willing to give to other’s.

So, back to my first question, What’s Your Gift! What is it that you bring to the table? What is it that your employer finds “remarkable” about you? Please, don’t tell me that you just show up, do your job
(based on their map) and go home. Because if you are, then you’re probably completely frustrated, or you’re finding an outlet to do your art outside of work. Maybe you’re coaching little league, singing in the church choir, organizing a fund raiser for a family in need, or performing the role of president for your HOA. None of these things are bad, or wrong to do…in fact, it’s great if you are contributing after hours…we/your community needs you! But, why aren’t you contributing like that at work? If it’s an issue of the company culture, the boss, or you just haven’t gotten the opportunity to share your gift…then, you have a choice….either try to change the culture, express your thoughts/ideas with the boss and show them, through your actions, just how indispensable you are (difficult to do, but can happen)….or, find a better place to share your gifts and do your art!

The point is this, we must stop thinking of ourselves as commodities, as just another cog in the wheel. Why would you want to spend your days laboring in the factory, when you could be out performing your art, and giving your gifts? We are at the right place, at the right time in history to embrace our true selves, our artistic selves, our unique personalities that create unique art. Our art is not everyone else’s art…that’s why it’s called art. It’s up to us to decide how we choose to express our art. But once we know what our art is….let’s do it, do it well, do it loud, and start giving it away! (It really is time for MORE COWBELL).

Now, not everyone will want to become an artist and give their gifts and become indispensable…but, that’s okay, they’ll stay in the factory. The one’s that get it, the one’s that say no to standardization, commoditization, and conformity will win. Yes, I know some of the things we love to do….and we do because of our talent, abilities, and incredible gifts we’ve been given, may not be able to be turned into money making ventures…right away. Heck, they may never make you great money…but, don’t stop doing your art…because it can lead to other great opportunities, you may have never thought of, that will make you money. So, my point is that whatever job you’ve decided to do, whatever company you’ve decided to join….love something about it. Love what you do! It may not be possible, for the time being, to do what you love.

Let me explain this point a little better. We’ve all heard the saying….”Do your Passion”. That’s great….and some of us will be fortunate enough to do “what” we love….and make a living from it. But, for the rest of us, we might want to think of this a little differently. Let’s try to look at what we do…and start to find the stuff about the job we do that we absolutely love!

I have a great example of this. True story. I know a clerk, Mary, in the drive-thru lane at McDonalds…..Mary loves her job. I can tell. Every time I go through the drive-thru, (just getting a cup of coffee, not a Big Mac) Mary’s usually there, with a smile on her face, a pleasant manner, always asking us how we are….what’s new in our world, etc. and cheerful…bubbly, really pleasant. She literally makes you feel better, just by going through the drive thru at McDonalds! That’s powerful stuff. That’s becoming indispensable…a true Linchpin. And the Manager at McDonald’s knows it! She’s been on local morning TV/Radio….and the Manager has actually put a Banner on the outside of this McDonald’s publicizing that “Mary” works there and to come see her.

The strange thing is …this is a Drive-thru…it’s supposed to be quick, faster than going inside, very few words should be exchanged, just money , and the clerks should only be confirming your order, right? Couldn’t be farther from the truth….at this McDonalds. They obviously are not graded on speed, number of hamburgers sold per minute, etc. They must be encouraged to make lasting customers, to make the drive-thru experience a happy and memorable one.

The funny thing is, the customers waiting in the line don’t care if they have to wait, there’s always a line…and it keeps getting bigger. I walked inside one day…it was empty…everyone was waiting in line to talk with “Mary”, the Cheerful Drive-thru Clerk. Now…that’s a Linchpin…although she doesn’t know it. She just knows that she’s found a job and within that job she’s found something she absolutely loves to do…talk with her customers and make sure they’re getting their needs met….nourishment! She’s turned taking people’s money into art, and is truly giving a gift to everyone she comes in contact with… the gift of connection, humanity, generosity, and kindness.

We all can bring Gifts…we all have a gift to bring. That’s really not the question. The question becomes are we ready to look at what we do each day, what skills we possess, what talents we have, what unique abilities we’ve been given, and turn just one of those skills into art? Do it so well, that it becomes our reason for being, our gift? We can choose to become indispensable. Are we ready to create art, take a risk, give our gift? I sure do hope so….The World is counting on it!

What are you Scared of?

Have you ever just asked yourself….Why you’re doing this or doing that? Why you need this or that? Why you believe in something? Why you have made the decision you’ve made? Why you enjoy listening to someone, vs. someone else? The one common denominator in all these questions is the word WHY? Why will always pull the how and the what….Think about it. We get up in the morning….why? Because we need to get the kids off to school, make breakfast, start our jobs, etc, etc. But Why? Because we “believe” that it’s critical, necessary, or maybe because we want to be great Mom’s, Dad’s, Employers, Employees….but, think about it for a minute. Why? Keep asking yourself Why 5 times….pretty soon on the 5th Why you’ll expose the deeper reason, the real reason to why you do something….then you’ve found “IT”….the truest reason behind why you do, behave, believe, and live the way you do.

Now we’re on to something…So let’s apply the WHY Principle to a popular word that we’ve all been hearing and reading about lately….Innovation. Is Innovation scary to you? Why? What are you afraid of…looking stupid, failing, being ridiculed, embarrassment, shame….or success? Sometimes we’re afraid and scared of things working…then what? They’ll expect more of me, they’ll expect me to deliver every time…it may mean I’ll have to work longer, harder or maybe even get promoted. Or, maybe were scared to succeed because we don’t have all the answers….maybe we’ll have to learn a new skill, or take another class, or get spec’d up on a subject we know very little about. Did you know that we use only about 10% of our brain power? Now, that’s actually a good thing…that just means we have a lot of room for storage…or memory…and a whole lot of room for learning, digesting, and practicing new ideas, new ways of doing things and increasing our Brain Power…the greatest engine of our bodies.

So, what’s stopping us….What are we scared of? Why is it that our lizard brain…our amygdala
(mini-brain), stops us from moving forward….taking a risk, trying something different? I know it’s scary to step out from the crowd….but, Great Leaders, people who believed in a better way, a better tomorrow, a larger pursuit, they were the ones who inspired us, inspired a generation, inspired a nation. Think about who recently has inspired you? Maybe it’s the Phoenix Suns, our President, your son or daughter, a teacher at school, a grocery clerk, a small business owner, a humanitarian that is bringing relief to Haiti, your Mom. We’re inspired by these people because we identify with their beliefs, their causes, their reason for leading….We BELIEVE in Their WHY….and we are willing to make their Why, our Why?

That’s how movements start….Someone decides to lead….they may look foolish, out there dancing by themselves at first…but, pretty soon, someone else joins them…now there’s 2 people dancing….pretty soon a few more people decide to join in ….they are welcomed with open arms….sharing the love….and now you’ve started something, now you’ve started to share leadership, now others are embracing your WHY and now it’s their WHY too! All of sudden you’ve created more followers that believe in the Why….and now, it doesn’t matter who the original leader was…because the Movement….the Cause, the WHY is bigger than just one person.

This is what we have to understand….It’s scary to change, to stand out, to dance by yourself…at least for a little while….But, don’t give in to the Lizard Brain….don’t allow your emotional fear of failing or succeeding get the best of you. Change is not the enemy….the fear of “being changed” is. But, if we understand the WHY….if we start to believe in our own WHY….we can overcome the fear of being changed, the fear of the unknown, the fear of losing what we have, the fear of not getting what we want.

We’ll start to embrace change in all its glory! We’ll start to look at the world differently. We’ll start to look at each other differently. We’ll start to expect ourselves to fail, and fail often, because we’ll know that the only way to break through and create something great is to try….We have to first try to walk…then run. Of course it’s scary, it makes you feel anxious, and maybe even sick to your stomach….but, it’s also exciting to be part of something you believe in, something you are willing to give your time and effort to. Something you can say you had a hand in creating, or some amazing innovation you contributed to that helped your company enter a new market, increase market share, or satisfy more customers.

What Are You Scared Of? It’s time to get over it? It’s time to suppress the Lizard Brain and allow the rest of your amazing brain to be, do, and create amazing things. It’s time to embrace Innovation and yes, embrace your failures, too. You’ve heard the stories of Edison, Einstein, Bill Gates, Donald Trump, Orville and Wilbur Wright…..they didn’t make it the first time, or the second time….but, eventually they did make it…and WOW, are we appreciative that they didn’t give up after the first failure….they knew their WHY was important, their WHY would change history, their WHY would make the world a better place, their WHY was powerful….so, people identified with them. Not because of what they did, or how they did….everyone knows what they do and how they do it…but, because they had a provocative WHY. A why that gave them purpose, momentum, motivation, inspiration…..and it inspired other’s too.

It’s your time, it’s your time to define your WHY…..you’re companies WHY, Your Product/Service WHY….and let’s Lead….with guts and glory and INNOVATION!

Resist the LIZARD!

I’m in the process of reading Seth Godin’s latest book, Linchpin, and realized how well it applies to what’s happening in Arizona with the Immigration issue. We sabotage ourselves by letting what he calls the lizard brain, stand by, and jump into action whenever basic survival needs are at stake. Scientists call this part of the brain the amygdala, and this mini-brain apparently takes over whenever we’re angry, afraid, aroused, hungry, or in search of revenge. (Wow, doesn’t that sound like what’s been happening the past two weeks in Arizona.) This part of the brain gets pumped up and starts resisting logic and rational thought. It’s ready to fight! In other words the lizard brain activates emotional responses, such as fear or euphoria. The big part of the brain, ( the giant crinkled rubbery mushroom part), it’s big (about 3 lbs and 5 oz.) … but weak. It’s powerless over the screaming lizard brain, it freezes and surrenders. The lizard brain takes over. The challenge, to us all, is to learn some self-management. Self-Management involves understanding Emotional Intelligence and practicing it. If we learn how to hijack our amygdala, self-manage it for just a brief instant, just enough time to allow the other part (s) of our brain some time to process what’s happening and perhaps why… then reasoning, planning, judgment, and problem solving can take place.

If the Arizona legislature would have read this book, Linchpin, first…maybe they wouldn’t have jumped to such an irrational move as they did. I know, I’ve heard the frustration with our borders for a long, long, time. But, if you have a chance to read the Arizona Republic’s Sunday edition, May 2, 2010, you might just see a different side to the story. Bravo, to the Arizona Republic for presenting some “factual” data, and not just drumming up a lot of fear, hatred, and angst in our citizens. Oh, and they are quick to call out all parties….not just Republican or Democrat.

Let’s face it, we need to bring our economy in Arizona, as well as the US, back to life! Don’t you think the Mexican and Canadian citizens spend money in Arizona? Of course they do! It’s a big part of our economy….they shop, they buy, they eat, they stay in our hotels. They buy homes, they rent homes, they keep our apartments full, they keep our hotels occupied, they frequent our events and love our Sports teams. They create JOBS! Let’s not throw the baby out with the bathwater. Let’s disengage our Lizard Brains for just a few days, weeks, and re-engage our rational brains to look at all sides of this issue.

Funny, when I was working in Houston, Texas during the peso devaluation crisis…I think this was in the 80′s….early or mid, my boss at the time summoned his Tiger Team to discuss the problem. (A Tiger Team is a group/collection of diverse individuals, heading up various divisions and functions of a company, the leaders) . So, what was the problem? The Problem Defined: How were we going to attract the Mexican shopper back to Texas, to our store, to buy? Wow, now if that isn’t ironic….We actually were taxed with coming up with ideas and a doable solution for attracting and sustaining the Mexico trade….Or in other words, we really needed them to cross the border, come to our store, buy our expensive stuff, or we were going to be in a world of hurt. Well, of course, we did come up with some very creative approaches to this problem and they did cross over, they did spend money, and we did avert the crisis we worked so hard to prevent. All because we saw the problem a little differently, we hashed it through in our war room, we played out different scenarios, different solutions, we looked at plan A, plan B, plan C and the consequences of each. We came to agreement or at least consensus, where we were all in Support of the Plan and the Solution! It really works, when you come together with a Common Goal and everyone is there for the same reason… to Fix it! We also knew how much our economy and our company depended on this trade from Mexico. So, we had momentum and motivation….our jobs! (We also had Great Leadership and Great Followership).

So what’s changed through the years. Well, we’ve always had the criminal element, drugs (as long as I can remember), smuggling, trafficking, etc. How the Mexican government is enforcing their laws and creating an economy for its’ people is another issue, one that has to be dealt with and obviously has had a huge effect on the US….but, how we deal with border security and the immigration issue is ours. We OWN it! Putting a band-aid, or instituting a knee-jerk reaction to the immigration problem isn’t going to make it better….we have to DEFINE the real problem, or problems, put our Lizard Brains to sleep for awhile, and allow our rational, problem solving minds go to work! Let’s Fix It!

I don’t have all the answers to these complex problems and issues, but I do know that creating an environment that promotes hate, fear, anger, and revenge is not the answer. Arizona’s citizen’s deserve better. We deserve a government that works for the people and by the people. We deserve rational minds, that bring people of all colors, ethnicities, and races together. We need to quit building walls to separate, and build relationships, understanding, and a community that works together to solve our problems. Maybe, just maybe, if we asked our Mexico neighbors and our Mexican-American Citizens of this state for their ideas, their help, and added the great minds in Technology, Real Estate, Commerce/Banking, Health & Safety, and Urban Planning, maybe we could start a Tiger Team in Arizona?….just like the one I was on so many years ago. Let’s not let a few politicians, on the fringe, just trying to seek out votes for the next election, make such long lasting, lizard brain decisions for us. It’s time for Leadership, Collaboration, Communication and Working Smart! It’s time for Innovation, Creativity, and Problem Solving . Let’s talk inclusion not exclusion. Arizona, you have an opportunity to do the right thing, the humane thing, to bring the best minds, most innovative ideas to the forefront, to truly solve our complex problems, not just for Arizona, but for our Nation. You have the opportunity to MODEL the way, to show other’s how to apply the skills of sound leadership and rational thought. Please don’t lead out of hate, fear, and frustration…Lead with Understanding, New Ideas, and Innovations….We can build a better Mouse Trap we just need the WILL to do it!

Let’s Play House!…A tribute to Mom’s Everywhere

As I’m writing this, I’m looking at a picture of myself and my Mom from probably 1958 or ’59.  She was probably in her late 20′s…and what a knockout!  No wonder my Dad was smitten with her the first time their eyes met….from across the room.  You’ve all heard the story of how your Mom and Dad met….right?  If not, please ask them…it’s amazing what you learn about your parents from their retelling the story of their first encounter, how they felt, what they were doing, what they said to each other….and especially where they were.  It’s actually kind of funny to hear both versions…my Dad’s was always a little different, more macho,  from how my Mom remembers their first meeting….but, wow, there must’ve been some fireworks going off somewhere.

This picture of Mom and Me also reminds me of a time in my life when I thought the sun rose and set on her every word, her every movement.  I would watch my Mom put on her make-up in the morning, decide what she was going to wear, go grocery shopping with her, listen to the instructions and questions she gave the butcher about what she wanted and how many pounds of this and that.  I even remember listening to her phone call every morning with her best friend….they would talk for about an hour while I watched my favorite TV show,  Captain Kangaroo.  (I loved that show, and especially was intrigued by all the keys on the Captain’s key chain….I never quite understood what they were for, but I thought he must be really important.)  So yes, I think Mom’s are especially important Role Models for their Daughters and their Sons.

I grew up in those early years, before I started working at my Dad’s Drug Store, primarily with my Mom.  My sister was 2 years ahead of me, so she was already in school, doing her thing with her girlfriends and heaven forbid, if I tagged along it would be so awful and so embarrassing or whatever.  So, my Mom and I “hung out”.  I’m not sure if to this day she realizes how impressionable I was and what I picked up from her every move or thought. (Kids really are like little sponges…as proof, if you’ve ever watched the re-runs of the Art Linkletter show…Kids say the darnest things.)  Oh, that’s not to say that I wasn’t a little maverick…and maybe just a little stubborn, or bullheaded as my Mom would say.  I had my own thoughts, and ways of doing things, but, I do think I learned a lot of how to think, act, treat others, and get along in this big, bad, world from my Mom.

This picture is of a happier time, a time of innocence, a time of play, a time of love and joy.  We must have been on one of our family vacations….where you load up the Chevrolet, make sure you’ve turned off the coffee pot, Grandma and Grandpa are invited to come along,  and you head off down a 2 lane highway to one of your favorite little getaways.  Our favorites back then were the Wisconsin Dells, the Ozarks, and the Smokey Mountains.  I think we liked those places so much, because they were only a day’s drive, and there was a lot of “kid” stuff to do…bumper cars, horseback riding, spin paint, swimming, and of course building the BEST sand castle ever.  My Mom and Dad were really 2 big kids…and they had just as much fun “playing” as my sister and I did.    So, I’m not sure where this picture was taken, but it was one of those instant pics from a Photo Booth…you know the ones where you can’t quite fit your butt on the seat, but everyone packs in the booth….and says cheese a few too many times.

What does this all have to do with MOM.  Everything in my opinion.  There a so many bits and pieces of who I’ve become that I attribute from watching, listening, and modeling my Mom.   My Mom’s gifts to me are immeasurable.  The gift of gab, the gift of confidence, the gift of perseverance, the gift of cooperation, the gift of believing, the gift of generosity, the gift of acceptance, and the gift of following your dream… no matter what!   The gifts she gave me don’t lose their usefulness, they don’t go out of fashion, or get thrown away.  The gifts she gave me, will remain with me forever.  They’re inside my heart, my soul, and my make-up.  I know sometimes we say ….oh, my gosh, I sound just like my Mother…or, please, if you ever hear or see me sound like my Mom, shoot me!  Well, I think we all know in those moments of kidding around, we really love sounding like our Moms….because our Mom’s were,  and still are one of the most important people in our lives.

I grew up “playing house”….like a lot of little girls from my generation.  You know what playing house entails…you decide who you’re going to be….some great movie star, who your husband is going to be…some great movie star….and you pretend…with all your baby dolls and maybe just one other girlfriend ( who happens to be your best friend for life) that you’re this make believe family.  Of course, you’re playing  out what you’ve seen, heard, and filtered through your brain up until now,  most of  which is  from TV, Movies, Commercials, and of course your Mom and Dad.   I remember using candy cigarettes….to model smoking…which was very “cool” to do back in the 50′s and early 60′s….I even remember pouring a drink (cocktail, please) to have with our cigarettes.  Yes, my parents partied…just a little and they would invite their friends over to our home where the laughter and music would fill the house. Now, this was late 50′s and early 60′s, so women dressed up, and men wore ties…even for a casual get together at our home…very much like the look of Mad Men.  Of course, after we met the guests and said goodnight, we’d shuffle up the stairs to bed…sitting at the top of the stairs to listen or in our rooms until the delightful noise of the party would put us to sleep.

“Playing house” by myself or with my Best friend,  could go on for an hour or so….and resume the very next day…just like our Soaps of today…but, not quite so dramatic.

So, on this Mom’s Day….I’m reflecting on my Mom’s gifts to me…..Not the material gifts…although, I’m very grateful for all the wonderful things she’s bought and given me over the years.  No, on this Mom’s Day I’m reflecting on the gifts that are “intrinsic”….the one’s that she’s never really known she’s given…the ones that have shaped my life, my thoughts and my relationships.  So, thanks Mom for being such a huge Role Model in my life, and showing me through your words and actions that being a Mom never ends, and the gifts don’t either.